Well, victory is mine because I found a substitute for only $25 on amazon!
My new shower curtain in all its glory
The ruffles are larger, and it's made of a crinkle chiffon as opposed to cotton. Although I like the look of the cotton one more, this one is a better fit for my bathroom since as you can see, there's only about 1 1/2 feet of room between the toilet and the bathtub, and I really didn't want to be fighting ruffles every time I had to pee. This one isn't that poofy and since the fabric is thinner it hangs with less fooferah. (Yes, I am declaring that a word.)
So basically I love this shower curtain like ponies and sprinkles and cake and unicorns.
If you want your own ruffly piece of goodness, you can find them here.